Random sad post

It taking me long just to update my blog, right?
I'm not sure is it that good to blog something.
The thing is, are there any reader for my blog?
All this while, all my blogger friends stop blogging.
Perhaps still one or two out there remain, just lost in contact.

I have so much thing to blog, with little of time, more like I don't want to spent some time in blogging.
But after consider so much thing, the blog is a much safer place to post all my heart content.

My college life, suppose to be fun, but turn out dull. Not particularly dull, just, a little disappointed.
I met friends, make jokes, then, the next moment, hit the taboo, friendship gone.
Perhaps we still friends, just not that much of a friend than previous.
But one thing for sure is my wound is getting deeper.
Every time this shit happen, it felt like a sharp knife is stabbing into my heart.
I felt the pain. Like stepping on broken glass, that kind of pain.

Think before you say something? I think a lot, but even if I think, the outcome still the same.
What happened? Some times, it's not even my fault.
And even if someones else is wrong, it always end up I'm the one who apologize.
Is it me who treasure friendship or they just plain don't care about it.

I lost hope, hope in making close friends.
Every time when I think I were close enough to someone, this thing happened.
Then, the next minute, I stopped talking to them. Just like, 'pooff'', goodbye friend.
Now, I never call someone is real or best friend. Everyone is just a friend to me.

I was born with this fate I think, or not?
Hard in making friends.
Worst, I really does hope I meet more female friends than male.
I mean, they are more the caring type and I can be a good sister than a good brother.
Being raise in a family with more girls, my mum have a bunch of friends, they child are also girls, I did played with girls more than guys.
BUT I studied in a boys high school, entering engineering and football, which is mostly guys.

Off topic.

Anyhow, I wish something nice happen soon enough.
Or else, just let me have the chance travel back time and change decision? I don't think so.

Something to spice up a sad post. I just traveled to Melacca two weeks ago.
Here a look of me just waking up, thanks to Mun Ching snap this.



Time to go, it's almost 12 in the midnight. Night peers!